Tears before show time.

For the past 12 weeks, or something, I’ve been working on my Final Major Project which signifies the end of my time at Swindon College, and with it, education in Swindon. This project is more special than the past ones, this one gets exhibited and is open to the public.

I’ve done my project on faith, and entitled it Beatific Visions, and it has culminated in a shrine to human life. I put up my show on Wednesday. I was happy with it on Wednesday. Today, however, was another story.

I went along to Kembrey Park, the place where the show is held, and this time round other students work was up. I had a look around, and ran into a few people. “Is your work ironic? It’s just your last stuff was feminist and now this is… feminine.” “My mum’ll like your work.” “I didn’t see your work anywhere?” and then I returned to my own show, and looked properly. I sat on the floor infront of it and I realised it was missing something major: me.

It’s well stitched. It’s humourous. It’s pretty. It’s twee. It’s totally inoffensive… it’s boring. It does nothing to grab any attention, and it never would have, I just hadn’t realised before. I went to find my favourite tutor to ask him his opinion. He told me to talk him through it. I was stuck for words. I had nothing interesting to say. Completely disappointed in myself, I couldn’t help but cry. I’m not relying on this project to get a good grade, I don’t need one- I’m going to Uni whatever happens. But I want one. Because I’ve worked hard.

John was helpful. “Dooon’t cry, I cannae stand to see ye cry” He looked through my portfolio with me and asked if there was anything in there I could put up next to it, to counter balance. We ended up settling on a project that I had had difficulty with at the time. I liked only 50% of it and was embarrassed by the rest. But he talked me round, he’s very persuasive, I MTFU’d and we nailed into the chipboard a Viva La Vulva Banner and three pairs of knickers embroidered with vulvas and painted with stains. And suddenly, we have something that creates intrigue.

I’m bending the rules by displaying non FMP work but I certainly haven’t broken enough rules this project, so I better had start somewhere.

One Response to “Tears before show time.”

  1. sherbet head Says:

    The last picture makes me want to weep. I am especially fond of ‘Viva la Vulva’.

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